Food

I am super weird about food. I will LOVE a food and want to eat it all of the time and then I turn a corner and I don't want to look at it. I'm going through that with some of my food plan. I don't want the food that's on it. I'm trying to get creative but it's kind of bumming me out.

It's not that I want crap either. I've had three pints of coconut milk ice cream just waiting for a sweets craving. They haven't been touched. I made cookies for my man and I only ate one. No dough. Just one cookie. I didn't really even want it but I had to do quality control. I cannot feed my man sub par baked goods. Right?! LOL!

I am forcing myself to eat protein, veggies, and fruit (grapes taste super good right now). Sometimes, I'm allowing myself to eat what I want because I really don't want much. It is very strange for me. After years of food being such a crazy and controlling force in my life, it has no hold on me. I could take it or leave it. That's how I know I've gone through a heck of a lot of healing.

I had one moment this weekend when I started to power through a bowl of popcorn. It was sitting there after friends went home. I stopped and thought, "What am I doing? Something is off. What is off?" Within about 5 minutes I knew exactly what was wrong and I was able to address it without food. I just had to stop and connect with my feelings rather than numbing them with food.

All this to say that I am not 100% Paleo. I am about 80% and I'm not really worried about it. I feel really good about where I am with my food choices. I continue to train, my body continues to change, and the scale continues to drop. This is probably something that I will need to address at some point but I don't really feel the need to at this point. I feel at peace and it feels good.

If you have spent years battling food demons, please know that healing is available. There is light at the end of the tunnel. There can be a change. I know because I am living proof!